So Much To Vent, So Little Time
The last several days have seen a great number of things that should make free people's blood boil: the Governor Bush's administration is STILL trying to take the right to die in peace away from Oregonians, the Salvation Fuckers have been established by the the Governor B's administration as a federally-funded religious organization that can discriminate based on religion, Governor B has nominated a fundamentalist Christian with no judicial experience for a lifetime court appointment in the highest court in the land, and Governor Bush now wants to enact martial law in our own land by using our tax-funded military for civil law enforcement. To say that Governor Bush and his cronies are the single greatest threat to the ideals that founded the United States of America is an understatement (or perhaps the second greatest, as the complacency of the common American seems to be the first). But we shall not rant about him ad nauseum. Instead, I will babble a little about a few Good Things, and one Crappy Thing.
The Good Things? Well, for one, Serenity opened at #2 this past weekend. It couldn't have happened to a nicer movie. I cannot express how strongly I feel this movie is some of the best science-fiction in recent memory. In fact, Orson Scott Card and I have similar opinions about something for a change. He too feels that Serenity is well worth your time and money.
Two, every time I start to feel hopeless for the future of mankind, I generally am reminded in some small way that humanity may not be doomed. This man — this illiterate man — single-handedly running a private library of thousands of books for the betterment of his fellow man, is a shining beacon as to why mankind has come as far as it has. That despite all of our foibles, we have the capacity to give selflessly for the betterment of our fellows, is probably the one reason we have ever survived all the rampant stupidity, hatred, warring, and ignorance in this world. If only there were more like this man.
Three, Peter Jackson has been selected to make the Halo movie. Now, most video game movies suck. And most video games based on movies suck. But with Jackson at the helm, it could be quite interesting.
And now for the Crappy Thing. I don't know what has been happening to people, but I for one am disgusted with the growing trend of unwillingness to commit to ANYTHING. We're not talking about marriage here...not that sort of committment. We're not even talking about monogamy. This is about inter-personal relationships, and people's inability to commit to anything to maintain said relationships.
An example? Try planning a gathering of friends. Pick a day of the week, any day. Then inform your friends you'd like to host a gathering. First, you can forget RSVP, since nearly everyone on the planet seems to have forgotten how to RSVP. Second, if you hear from anyone at all, good luck trying to get a definite answer from any fucking one of them. At best, you'll get a "I'll try to be there," or a "I should be able to make it," or "I'm not certain I'm free, I'll let you know." You seldom, if ever, will get a "Yes, I will be there," or a "No, I'm sorry, but I can't/won't be there."
This has been a growing trend over the last several years. At first I thought it must be something to do with my generation, maybe they just don't practice those small social mores that help maintain good relationships. Then I find the same thing in generations both before and after mine. I hear from my mother that she can't get "yes/no" from anyone, and only ever gets "maybe," that no one she knows will ever plan and commit to ANYTHING. I hear from people younger than me they experience the same thing. So it is cross-generational! Where the fuck is this coming from?
Then, one of my closest, dearest friends starts doing it. That was the last straw. I told that circle of friends, "either our time together is important enough to commit to it, or it isn't," and that unless we had a "yes" from everyone involved at least a few days before our gatherings, that I would not be there. Which kinda sucked, but it needed to be said.
From now on, I will no longer accept "maybe." Either the relationship I have with someone is meaningful enough to both of us that both of us are willing to COMMIT to spending time together, or our relationship is obviously not important enough to someone in that equation. From now on, when offering plans, if I get anything indefinite, I'll just say "Oh, never mind then."
Don't get me wrong. I'm not demanding a "yes." I'm happy with "no." "No" at least tells me they aren't interested or are unavailable. "No" lets me makes plans based on their absence (less food, doing other things, et cetera). "No" is a perfectly normal, socially acceptable response. But "maybe" is nothing but a bullshit avoidance tactic that does nothing but negatively impact the recipient of said excuse. The recipient cannot plan effectively (does not know how much food to provide, is left wondering if they should bother making other plans, et cetera), and is left adrift because their friend didn't have the decency to say "No."
That's the Crappy Thing...that people are harming their relationships with their friends with indecisiveness or "polite" avoidance tactics. That they would rather cause their friends frustration by never committing to them in any fashion. That they would rather keep everyone on a string of maybes so they don't have to make a decision until the last fucking minute. Pretty fucking crappy if you ask me.