Unending Blah

So the past couple of weeks have been extremely rough. I just started the new job (same as the old job, just direct employee rather than contractor), had all the paperwork and hoops related to it, had a huge project move from pre-production to production, was on-call all that week (I don't think the phone ever stopped ringing), had a tour of the Waverly Hills Sanatorium, a bon voyage party for Chili, another week of on-call, more hell with the project that went production, et cetera ad nauseum.

I think I slept about an average of 2-3 hours a night for the past two weeks. And somewhere in there my best friend left town for a new job.

Last night I felt ill...lack of sleep...unending work...emptiness from Chili's departure...I was exhausted. I finally scored about ten hours of sleep last night, and I feel tons better for it. I can actually hold a thought for longer than a minute (by yesterday I was having trouble keeping a train of thought due to the sleep deprivation). I still feel sad at the lack of Chili, but other than that doing much better.

A cow-orker didn't understand why I felt such a sense of doom about Chili leaving. I tried to express to her why it was such an issue for me, but I don't think I got through. I tried to express how there are a small number of people without whom my life would either not be possible or greatly deflated. That these people stops being friends and become brothers and sisters...family. Chili is my family, and I am diminished without him near.